Memorial Day Family Fun in King’s Landing (Presented by the Iron Bank of Braavos)

Mangirling is a semi-regular feature that runs when the girls are too busy (lazy) to write their own posts, or when Johnny Rico feels the need to yell at the internet about something inconsequential.  Read on for this week’s rant, chronicling some possible Memorial Day activities in King’s Landing.

Whether by sea or by land, come to King’s Landing this Memorial Day and take part in the many family-friendly activities happening today in Westeros’ beautiful capital city. Notable citizens from all over the realm and beyond have sponsored events to entertain, delight, and amuse everyone from ages 4 to 64.

0900: Free Pancake Breakfast! – Sponsored by Margaery Tyrell, I mean Baratheon (Renly), I mean Tyrell (Renly died), I mean “Baratheon” (Joffrey), I mean Tyrell (Joffrey died), I mean “Baratheon” (Joffrey’s brother), but really… Lannister (come on, you know the rumors about Jaime and Cersei are true).

0930: Face Body Painting with Khal Drogo

1000: Men-At-Arms MIA/POW ceremony (Flea Bottom) – Sponsored by Jaime Lannister

1045: Kids Craft Table: Make your own dragon! – Sponsored by Daenerys Targaryen

1100: Boy Scout Nature Walk with the Knight of Flowers!

1115: Archery Demonstration! – Sponsored by Joffrey “Baratheon”

1145: Children’s Story Time and Puppet Show – Presented by Lord Varys

1200: Wall Climbing Club Demonstration with Ygritte from beyond the wall

1212: Children’s Crusade in support of the 7 Gods

1230: “Where’s Waldo?” Hide and Seek Extravaganza! – Sponsored by Jon Snow in support of the Stark Search and Rescue Foundation

1245: Join the King in the North in Dressing Up As Your Favorite Animal! – Sponsored by Lord Walder Frey

1330: Crossdressing Variety Show (main stage) with Arya Stark

1334: Rat Races (Flea Bottom) – Sponsored by Gendry

1370: Wall Building Demonstration with the Night’s Watch

1415: Parachute Club Demonstration – Sponsored by Lady Lysa Arryn

1430: “Chili” Cookout! – Sponsored by Lord Ramsay Bolton

1445: Dog Sled Demonstration – Presented by Bran Stark

1500: Pony Rides – Sponsored by Podrick Payne

1515: Murder Mystery  – Sponsored by Ned Stark

1530: Reptile Show – Sponsored by Daenerys Targaryen

1600: “Zombie” “Walk” with the White Walkers (please don’t make eye contact)

1700: Campfire Cookout (bring your own goat)! – Sponsored by Drogon

1745: Free Tour of the Red Keep!

1812: 1/2 price for all Men-At-Arms! – Sponsored by Lord Petyr Baelish

1900: Westeros Premiere Boy Band Performs (main stage)! – Sponsored by

1915:Slut Walk” Rally – Presented by Cersei Lannister

2003: Grape Crushing with “The Mountain” – Sponsored by Tywin Lannister

2015: Wine Tasting with Tyrion Lannister, Olenna Tyrell, Lord Petyr Baelish, and possibly Sansa Stark (but probably not)

2300: Royal Regatta and Boat Show in Blackwater Bay – Sponsored by “King” Stannis Baratheon

2300: Fireworks extravaganza over Blackwater Bay – Sponsored by Tyrion Lannister

What events would you attend? Anything else you’d like to request? Let us know in the comments!

Johnny Rico

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